If you want to ask Dr Lukats's advice send an email to askvictoria@ukmetro.co.uk . Please bear in mind she cannot enter into private correspondance and cannot answer all questions. Any advice given will be published on the website.

I'm an average to OK looking Irish bloke, 28, pretty happy and I've only ever gone with white girls up until now. About ten days ago or something I met a hot Asian lady on a dating website who is really loads of fun, has a great body, beautiful face and nice personality.

She is a hell of a lot more confident than any other bird I've ever gone with. Except for one thing - she doesn't drink and she won't have sex before marriage. Not normal sex, anyway. I've had her around my place a couple of times and each time we get closer to doing something she backs off traditional type sex and says we can only do it anally. She says then it won't count as sex before marriage.

But I've never been asked to do that sort of thing before and feel I'm entering into shady territory in the bedroom. Do many blokes find this sort of offer weird from a woman? Plus, she doesn't drink, so it's also strange thinking of her wanting to do that sober.

Make of this what you want. I'm sure plenty of readers will be happy to share their views on whether no sex before marriage means it's ok to have anal sex. I'm not here to pass moral judgement.

Perhaps the internet has had some role in encouraging activity or openness. I've even heard that anal sex is more commonly practiced among heterosexual couples than homosexual couples.

Whatever the case, for you, it doesn't really matter whether most people think anal sex is ok or even whether anal sex counts as sex before marriage or not.

You should think about whether this is something you want to do and discuss it with your girlfriend. Dare I say maybe you could get to know her a little better over the coming weeks and months before having sex with her?

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